Your biggest ownage moments

[DeltaMustang65]

lol "fire power". For some odd reason, I got a mental picture of Mike grabbing a "fire flower" and throwing fireballs at people.

Anywho, I witnessed a pwning of someone by an inanimate object, if that counts. It was in the parking lot at work several months ago. This guy was walking out of the front entrance into the little parking lot in front for the doctors and handicapped when he strode balls-first into a pole, hard, then resisted screaming and continued on his way by sheer force of will (and possibly embarrassment). The pole was one of those that are put up to protect pedestrian-filled areas from stray cars.

I was just about to walk out of the front entrance when I witnessed this, and had to immediately turn and go back inside to laugh. Especially funny were the looks on people's faces that were close by and visibly trying to keep it together after seeing this.

[IGNIGNOC]

I see plenty of people get pwnzered by the doors at my hotel. We lock them at night (after 11p.m.) and don't open them up again until 6a.m., but you can use a room key to open them up (which is CLEARLY marked on the wall NEXT TO THE EFFING DOOR), yet SO many diptards just go strolling into the doors face-first. It is always worth a laugh at their expense.

Several of them ask, "How do I open the door?"

Me: "use your room key."

Them: "Where?"

Me: "Right there, on the wall, where it says 'Use your Room Key to Enter'."

Them: "oh..." *feels stupid*

[DeltaMustang65]

Keeping up with a Dodge Ram 1500 on the freeway in moderate traffic, in my poor little Ford Taurus with it's itty bitty 3.0L V6. Damn mexicans...think they can just outrun me after nearly smashing me and my car. Good thing I know how to actually NEGOTIATE traffic at high speed while losing the minimum of time.

[Gamer3241]

(has a history of being a anime fan myself)

ok there are two moments one rRL and other a one from guitar hero



ok this dude has been hassling me for well SINCE THE BEGINNING OF THE SCHOOL YEAR

he'd had been pissing me off..... anyways when it turned out I was doing karaoke on that friday he told me that he threatened to make my live a living hell if I sang...so I gtot up and said "Is your whole purpose making my life a living hell?" he replied "Yes" so I got up from the comp
and BITCHSLAPPED HIM IN HIS THROAT (he actually started choking for a couple of seconds) and some of the club members were kind of impressed that I finally stood up for myself (well I mostly just ignore some and back down before) turns out he hasn't been the same ever since

now for some self pwnage

Ok at a local gamecrazy playing guitar hero, barely choked the final part of the solo of "Knights of Cydonia" (I dunno what part it was but I lost at 81% I think on expert) some dude comes by saying "Let me show you how a pro does it" then did the same song, he sucked on the parts I did well in and failed at 65% and then again but just gave up at 8% not to mention some people were there as well and just kind of laughed at him

not much but eh

[shipwreck22]

I have something similar, though I got 0wn3d.....sorta

I'm at my cousin's house and he has GH3 for Wii, so I played online. I faced off against a Bob on Expert Pro Face-off. 2 songs: Radio Song and TtFaF I missed 1 note on RS, yet I still beat him (he FC'ed it {Full Combo}), then TtFaF. I can't do the intro, and he could, so I'm trailing by 50k until the solo, where I get to within 20k. I get star power at Rampaging Dragons, I pull ahead, but I choke at he wins it in the end. Tie-Breaker time. I get the choice, and choose Stricken. I get around 410k and he gets about 270k. 0wn3dag3, pwn3d, pwnag3

[DeltaMustang65]

I'm was on the phone the other day with my union rep, trying to figure out what the hospital's excuse was for denying me an interview for the surgery orderly position. I'm already the float orderly for the entire hospital, mind you. I'm also trying to find out why the position was given to someone from the housekeeping dept that has only been around for 6 months, and has no exp or training. Total BS, plain and simple, I just want to see how they explain themselves. The hospital gave the union guy a bunch of excuses that didn't amount to shit, really, so I didn't get much in the way of real answers. That was to be expected, though. Here are a couple of ways I ended up owning the union guy (who is a total useless douche, ask ANYone at the hospital).

One of the bullshit excuses the hospital was using was that I have a pattern of calling in sick, says the union guy. There were 5 days I called in sick last year, and I had gotten a verbal warning. They were acting like it was a write up, which I would only get if I continued to do something bad. Anyway, I asked him why the first 4 years I worked here and didn't use so many sick days (like 5 a year is a lot) didn't mean anything. I also stated that I even wrote on the warning something along the lines of "I work very closely with the sick every day. I'm going to get sick from time to time. This is a hospital."

The union guy replied that it's like not speeding for 4 years, and then on the 5th year you start speeding.

I stopped him right there and said that's not nearly the same. Speeding is a conscious decision, getting sick is NOT. I told him that that example is not working for me.

He immediately goes into a tantrum on the phone (no BS, I wish to god I had it recorded), and yells "I don't care if it doesn't work for you!" As if it works for anyone else, right?

Pwned. The first thing a REAL union person will tell you, don't get upset or raise your voice or ANYTHING like that during a discussion, meeting, etc.

Anywho, once this guy calms down a bit, we start to move on, but not before I ask him if there's someone else I can talk to because I'm detecting an attitude. He never said, but I'm sure that pissed him off more. I tell him that those sick days I'm taking are when I'm actually very sick, and I also happen to come in to work when I have a simple cold or something, but they don't seem to care about that because it doesn't help there case. I tell him that I went to my union rep on the job when they tried to give me that verbal warning about being sick too much, and they didn't do shit.

The union guy brilliantly says that it doesn't matter if you're really sick or not when you're using your sick days.

Again, I stop him right there and call him on his B.S. I say "Well, I sure HOPE it matters! I can see how a verbal warning would make sense if I was calling in sick when I wasn't actually sick."

Pwned again. He's making it too easy. Keep in mind, I've had to deal with this prick many times, and this time, I just decided to let him have it. It's not like a need a good relationship with my union if the jerks aren't going to represent me anyway. This was out of a pretty long phone conversation, and the whole time it seemed as if all he cared about was the excuses the hospital was using, and he didn't give a shit about my side. Maybe the hospital is sending him more cash than what he gets out of our union dues...

One lovely revelation, turns out that the union reps at the hospital are the only ones that can file a grievance for us, and they're the idiots that send us to this guy up in Sacramento, as if he has any power. This whole time, they've been giving me the run around. And the guy I'm dealing with on the phone said once before that I have to get in touch with him within 30 days if I want to file a grievance. That time, I had been in touch with the ACTUAL union reps for that all along for over 30 days, in which time they did nothing. Basically, the union purposely keeping us in the dark. Not only that, but they make deals behind closed doors with the hospital, without taking votes with us like they're supposed to. I've been going around the hospital talking to other people about the problems they've had with the union, and trying to find out how to vote our reps out of there since they don't have our interests. So not only am I going to have pwned this guy over the phone, I'm going to pwn them right out of the bed they're in with the hospital assholes.

That's uber pwnage, right there.

[cleopatra]

Good Job Matt *aplodes*

Ok so last Monday I was driving in St.Peters Missiouri which is a part of St.Louis I don't know very well. Anyway, I was there for a job interview and on my way back I knew there was a gas station and that i needed gas soooooo I was looking for it and go in the left lane. Well right after I did that I saw the gas station but there was police officer beside me so I was going 35 in a 40 so I speed up and got infront of him and there was plenty of room. 10secs later he had his lights on and pulled me over. He got out of his car and asked me for my license and registration and I gave it to him and asked is there a problem officer, because I wasn't speeding and have my seatbelt on. He proceded to chew me out for "recless driving" which I was NOT doing. He was just pissed i got infront of him. He was so mean to me he made me cry and that pissed me off because I was respectful and he treated me like I was a whore on the side of the road and even thery don't deserve to be treated that way. He took my address and said he was going to mail me a ticket. Well I had to go to the bank and I was crying the whole way there and getting more pissed off by the second. I went into the bank and the lady up front saw me all upset and asked if she could help me i said "yes, infact can you give me directions to the St.Peters Police Department" she kindly did and I drove there and marched right in and asked to speak to the man incharge, after I told the police office infront of me my story with tears in my big brown eyes he got the head police officer. I told him my story and he called the bastard in and he had to apologize. It is not 9 days later and guess what NO TICKET. F U JERK. LOL
Over 9000!!!!!!!!!! for me ZERO for the bastard of a cope

[DeltaMustang65]

Something similar happened to Meghan. Some cops just can't handle it any time people don't drop 10mph slower than the speed limit and clear the way as if they were an ambulance or fire truck. The police unfortunately gave Meg the ticket anyway, but luckily it was a small amount.

[½ A Gram]

Delta: I know how you feel. My mom works as a nurse in a nursing home. What you describe is basically just another day for her. it's idiocy.

Anyway, justa few weeks ago, my brother and i pwned some guys.

Him and his girlfriend were at McDicks, waiting in the drive thru. A buncha guys in a mid 90's white toyota (best guess) were talking to some others douchebags instead of ordering. So, his Girlfriend honks after around 5 minutes of freakin waiting. they get out (all 4 of em) and start beaking off my brother. Now, he is a fairly big guy. 6'1, 185, and very little fat on him. Strong Norskie.

They are mostly, by his guess, under 5'10, and maybe 140-150 pounds. Justa basic guess. He ends up telling them to get the **** back in their car, and order, before something happens.

Both them, and my brother, order. As My brother and his woman were driving out, they noticed (guess who) the white toyota behind them. As they drove home, those asshats proceeded to tailgate aggressively, pass, brake, and then fall behind again, and just make general asses of themselves. As they were being followed, my brother decided to call me. He told me to come to the front door, with my bat, and his machete.

By that time, i knew something had popped off. that machete is never brought out, unless someone needs the living hell scared out of them.

When i get to the door, they pull up, and no one is there. apparently, the idiots had turned around as they pulled into our driveway (which is pretty damned long.) So, we stayed up for a while, watching and waiting, as the last thing we needed was for her car to be smashed out whilst we were asleep.

The NEXT DAY, these idiots pull up, in broad daylight. I see them through our front window, and get my brother. we waltz outside, me with my bat in my hand, and handily pwn them.Now, i usually try to be a laid back guy. Honestly. I don't rush into violence. but these guys just pissed us both off. we walked down our driveway, shouting and working ourselves into a real old state, and then proceeded to kick the living shit out of them. I dropped the bat just before i threw my first shot, as it woulda have gotten in the way.

Once we were done, i grabbed the bat, and smashed out the headlights on their car. Then, as they piled into it in shame, I realized that there were taillights too, and proceeded to smash the shit out of them.

The best part was, they had to drive away in that junkheap, after getting their asses handed to them, when they had the apparent advantage.

[DeltaMustang65]

I can't remember if I've mentioned this here before, but that reminds me of the time I had some overweight, middleaged white douche get out of his crappy pick up and try to come after me because he was barely able to be a dick and cut me off in my Mustang. And that was only by nearly driving up on a pedestrian island and nearly hitting a traffic light post. LOL I had only accelerated enough to where it wouldn't be safe to cut me off, but SURPRISE! Idiot.

When he got out, I threw it in reverse and nailed it for a short distance, then started lighting the tires up as if I was getting ready to run him down.

Anyway, he ended up following me to my friend's house close by. He stopped in front, and started yelling and shit as if I was the one in the wrong. I simply asked him if he was looking to get shot. I didn't have a gun, of course, but I wanted him to get the clue with the minimum of talk.

Moral of the story: people are fucking stupid. Whether they think they are "safe" surrounded by sheet metal and can do whatever they want, or when they are retarded enough to leave their car in a fit of impotent rage. Not talking about you, but yeah, be careful some idiot teenager doesn't pull a gun on you at the drive through. lol

P.S. I need guns.

[½ A Gram]

In that case, a knife can be thrown quicker than he can get out hsi gun. Why? Because most of those idiots have never seen a gun, much less shot one, or pulled one out, and store it in their crotch, or up their ass crack.

I still have to find the shithead who dented in the pipe of my woodstove...those chimneys are 350 a piece.

And speaking of maiming people with blunt objects.

We have a father who owns alot of tools. mostly mechanic stuff, form, as you can guess, his job. One day, our garage is broken into, and the bastard steals our ohm meter. Now, that is a very nice ohm meter, and we'd rather not lose it. so, we watch the guy who is carrying it, and wait for him to join a group of idiots who, we presume, he is going to sell it to. Knowing it'd be better to wait for him to get caught up in the sale, than try to chase him down, my brother gets me to go get the 2.5 foot long piece of a solid hickory core and fibreglass wrapper hockey stick he cut.

I go and get it, give it to him, and grab my trusty bat. (which was my fathers, form his little league days. a good, reliable bat it is. Small, and easy to wield.) I then proceed to clamber up on our back fence, and see if things should get out of hand.

My brother walks clean up to the guy, just behind and to the...i believe it was to the guys right, as my brother swings from right to left, for the most power. As he walked up right behind him, in perfect range, without any attitude or anything, he shouted
"WASSUP BITCH?!" and swung for the guys knee.

A loud crack was heard. and the guy's knee was broken.he still tried to run, and my brother switched grip, and cracked the other one. by this time, the would be buyers had scattered. i don't think he broke the other knee, but it should did make the poor thief wail. he picked up the ohm meter, dusted it off, and proceeded to walk back around the corner to our place, without a second glance.

Someone else called an ambulance, cuz one came by, and picked him up. know it wasn't form our place though.

not my own ownage moment, but DAMN that was cool to watch.

[IGNIGNOC]

I guess I must put out some "sub-conscious" vibe that I would LOVE to shoot some fucktard, so they don't tend to follow me anywhere. I do VERY much like the comment, Matt. "Are you wanting to get blasted? 'Cuz, y'know, I could if you continue to insist..."

[vitg]

Just a couple of quick points as it nearly the end of my lunch break.

Matt - If you had a valid sick leave certificate for your days off your Hospital is screwed as that is discrimination right there.

Cleopatra - Cops cannot send you tickets in the mail except for speed camera offences so he was just shitting you big time.
Good tactics with the tears an all though, just remember do not let them make you cry for real, but give 'em the tears big time when you need to.

As for the rest - we need Guns !

Road rage is a terrible thing and I would urge everyone to be cautious, all jokes aside.

[DeltaMustang65]

Believe it or not, according to the union, doctor's notes and the like don't make a difference either. I brought that up, I just didn't mention it in my rant.

So how do you like that? They're bargaining away our rights left and, well...right. No joke, either. Someone even got in "trouble" or whatever, but it's time people start being held accountable by the law or something. I'm sure there are labor or union or SOME kind of laws being broken by these assholes, it just seems like everyone is content to simply complain and not actually DO anything.

Oh, and don't you just LOVE the "Well, you can fight the battle and lose the war" line? Just how stupid does the union think we are? If you don't fight the battles, there IS no war! Assholes! But I guess they're used to being someone's b!tch for life.

That's about to change. I've been looking for another job (part time at least) for awhile, so as you can imagine, I'm beyond giving a f@ck about being on anyone's shit list anymore. F@ck 'em, the old, fat, ugly, wrinkly, over-tanned, 10 pack a day smoking, no life having, lazy ass motherf@cking, hypocritical failures at life, that hate regular nice folk so much that they have to harass people that are putting in an honest day's work and just trying to get by while they also get an education, so they don't turn out like these very same administration assholes that don't have enough work to do that they have to be that way to give the illusion that they indeed have a job to do so they don't get their useless asses fired.

Whew...

[½ A Gram]

wow. I thought i could rant.

good stuff. And keep fighting.